Annoying, but my weight still influences my life. While I’m comfortable with food and certainly never binge or use food for emotional reasons, I’m still focused on the size of my body.
I’ve gained ten pounds this year and weigh the most I’ve weighed since losing 100 pounds 25 years ago. While not completely sure where the weight came from, I chalk it up to age (how did I get to be 52?!) and being a little looser with food.
I’m really enjoying my new, more relaxed approach to eating. I let myself eat a little more and more varied foods, and it’s nice; however, I’m less intrigued by the ten new pounds.
The ten pounds, themselves, are okay – I’d kept myself pretty thin for me, and I am in my 50s and heading into perimenopause, after all – but I don’t want to gain more and more and more. Where will it stop?
Where is the healthy, sane place? Do I accept my new body and keep my happy new eating habits? What if I continue to gain weight, but don’t want to change my food intake?
My boyfriend doesn’t care and isn’t remotely less interested in me. (He’s less excited about my new and unflattering short haircut, but that will grow.)
Yes, I’m less comfortable physically (belly roll, bra strap marks, etc.), but that doesn’t make cutting back calorically seem worth it. I’m happy in my life and just not interested in getting back into that consuming weight-watching lifestyle that weight loss would require.
Guess I’ll stay the course. Happily.